In this newsletter: An update on the kids, a short essay about how companies should compensate the unpaid labor of their employees' spouses; what doctors wish people knew about decision fatigue; information about anti-abortion "pregnancy crisis centers" and why they are so dangerous, and much more.
Your perspective on the CEO is so on the nose. I am a military spouse and a SAHM and appalled at our US military uses the unpaid “volunteer” labor of mostly women to perform key social work tasks for the military. It is a huge honor to be “key spouse” and to do the work of taking care of families many of which have significant needs. Many of these spouses are forced by necessity to give up jobs or job growth opportunities to help the military member get promotions through frequent moves and help their children acclimate to new communities. I am so tired of “hero” being an excuse to not value people in their fullness and not give them the compensation or support they truly need.
In addition, we need to consider women who did not want to “stay at home” but are basically forced into when they have to relocate for the husbands work. I know too many smart women who want to work but can’t because of restrictions of their visas and then limited opportunities in their new countries (language, validation of titles, etc).
Jun 24, 2022·edited Jun 24, 2022Liked by Gabrielle Blair
This CEO conversation is so on the money--to the tune of 600K. Why isn't everyone talking about this all the time? (I think about this ALL the time). I'm married to someone who's home economy and government (in Hungary) values these contributions and actually pays stay-at-home mothers for some of it, and while it's not enough--it's a start: things like three-year paid maternity leave per child; expanded childcare; free or discounted summer camps for children. The more kids you have, the more support and exemptions you receive. Mothers with at least four children have a full exemption from personal income tax--for the rest of their lives. The culture and government see and value the work of women (at home and in the workforce), and the hoops they jump through to do it.
Your email came at the right time as today is the day that SCOTUS officially rolled by the rights of women in the US have bodily autonomy. Between this, the gun decision and the other decisions from this week and those on the horizon, my fight or flight reaction is leaning strongly toward flight right now. My husband and I were in Paris at the beginning of June and it was a truly spectacular trip. It was depressing though to see my country through the lens of international news. All guns and violence, I wonder what the news of the US must look like this week? I feel such deep shame for my country, we were never a shining city on a hill and we are farther away from that ideal than we have been in a half century.
If only. You have opened my mind about the possibilites instead of the hopeless bitterness I thought about it before. So many stories of women not having their own retirement and discarded too often.
Sending love and strength to all of our American friends. We are with you all the way from across the oceans. We are angry and shocked too, but we will fight with you. It’s time for people to unite to ensure a fair and equitable system for all citizens of the world. ❤️💪🏻
I appreciate your perspective on women as unpaid volunteers and agree with many points but As a “mostly” stay at home mom I do have to recognize that it is my spouse who makes it possible for me to stay at home and keep things running. My spouse gives all of his paycheck to the upkeep and maintenance of our family. Without his work, I couldn’t do my work and vice versa. It is a joint effort that takes 100% from both of us. He might have 4 weeks time off, but those 4 weeks are filled with family work projects, family vacation etc. I am grateful that I have a choice to be a stay at home mom. Most of the women I know are working and taking care of everything at home. I think a good discussion could be had on the sharing of home responsibilities when both partners are working full time.
Your perspective on the CEO is so on the nose. I am a military spouse and a SAHM and appalled at our US military uses the unpaid “volunteer” labor of mostly women to perform key social work tasks for the military. It is a huge honor to be “key spouse” and to do the work of taking care of families many of which have significant needs. Many of these spouses are forced by necessity to give up jobs or job growth opportunities to help the military member get promotions through frequent moves and help their children acclimate to new communities. I am so tired of “hero” being an excuse to not value people in their fullness and not give them the compensation or support they truly need.
In addition, we need to consider women who did not want to “stay at home” but are basically forced into when they have to relocate for the husbands work. I know too many smart women who want to work but can’t because of restrictions of their visas and then limited opportunities in their new countries (language, validation of titles, etc).
This CEO conversation is so on the money--to the tune of 600K. Why isn't everyone talking about this all the time? (I think about this ALL the time). I'm married to someone who's home economy and government (in Hungary) values these contributions and actually pays stay-at-home mothers for some of it, and while it's not enough--it's a start: things like three-year paid maternity leave per child; expanded childcare; free or discounted summer camps for children. The more kids you have, the more support and exemptions you receive. Mothers with at least four children have a full exemption from personal income tax--for the rest of their lives. The culture and government see and value the work of women (at home and in the workforce), and the hoops they jump through to do it.
Your email came at the right time as today is the day that SCOTUS officially rolled by the rights of women in the US have bodily autonomy. Between this, the gun decision and the other decisions from this week and those on the horizon, my fight or flight reaction is leaning strongly toward flight right now. My husband and I were in Paris at the beginning of June and it was a truly spectacular trip. It was depressing though to see my country through the lens of international news. All guns and violence, I wonder what the news of the US must look like this week? I feel such deep shame for my country, we were never a shining city on a hill and we are farther away from that ideal than we have been in a half century.
If only. You have opened my mind about the possibilites instead of the hopeless bitterness I thought about it before. So many stories of women not having their own retirement and discarded too often.
Sending love and strength to all of our American friends. We are with you all the way from across the oceans. We are angry and shocked too, but we will fight with you. It’s time for people to unite to ensure a fair and equitable system for all citizens of the world. ❤️💪🏻
I appreciate your perspective on women as unpaid volunteers and agree with many points but As a “mostly” stay at home mom I do have to recognize that it is my spouse who makes it possible for me to stay at home and keep things running. My spouse gives all of his paycheck to the upkeep and maintenance of our family. Without his work, I couldn’t do my work and vice versa. It is a joint effort that takes 100% from both of us. He might have 4 weeks time off, but those 4 weeks are filled with family work projects, family vacation etc. I am grateful that I have a choice to be a stay at home mom. Most of the women I know are working and taking care of everything at home. I think a good discussion could be had on the sharing of home responsibilities when both partners are working full time.