I didn't start out married life planning not to wear my wedding rings. I assumed I would wear them every day. But it turns out I don't. 25 years in and it hasn't seemed to affect our marriage.
I stopped wearing my wedding ring(s) during the pandemic. The pandemic was hard on my marriage. I feel like we are in a stronger place now after a lot of difficult conversations but I also realized I needed to not hold so tightly to our marriage. As I continue to evolve as an individual and become more myself as I approach my mid-40s, I needed to accept the possibility this would not last, even as I continue to want it and work for it with all my heart. Not sure if that makes sense but I realized I had to prioritize being true to myself, no matter the consequences. For some reason, it felt right to just not wear any rings for a while. I also dramatically downsized all the type of jewelry when I had kids. Too many grabby hands!
42 years ago ... I didn't want an engagement ring at all, but my fiancé thought it was the right thing to do (1979!) -- and I admit when I saw all those glittering diamonds on a velvet cloth I did kind of want one! We had so little $, and he spent $500 on a 21-point diamond -- it was minuscule but it wasn't terribly uncommon to have less than a carat back then. But, I am a lefty, and to have that sticking-up diamond on my left hand was incredibly annoying. I took it off after about three months and never wore it again, although I would occasionally take it out and admire its shine. My husband didn't mind :) We both wore/wear wedding rings, and that is fine with me. I have a very plain white gold etched band (because I don't like yellow gold), and I never take it off. It's survived fine. About a year and a half ago, our eldest asked me if he could have my engagement ring to propose to his girlfriend (he's a near-starving artist). I immediately said yes but I told him it's at least only about a quarter the size of diamonds these days; would his girlfriend be okay with a tiny ring? Turns out she loves it, she loves the sentimentality of it, and she has pretty, slim fingers that make that little chip look very good. I'm completely content!
My wedding ring had a bent prong so was waiting in my jewelry box to go to the jewelers when our house was burglarized while we were camping. We replaced my original ring with one I didn't like nearly as much, and it wasn't practical to wear as the mother of small kids. I realized at some point that it was lost. We replaced it one more time, back to the original design. My husband (and the insurance, I'm sure!) said no more rings! But at some point I've become more sensitive and if I wear the ring a lot it's irritating, so...I hardly wear it. Which is kind of sad, because it's beautiful.
I wear my engagement and wedding rings most days. I do take them off in the kitchen and while doing projects.
My husband lost his wedding ring, which he confessed to me about 10 days after he realized he couldn’t find it. Our rings weren’t a set. His was unique and beautiful, and I am still sad that it’s gone. (It was a heavy yellow gold with embossed acorns and leaves. It was vintage, and I remember thinking it was fate when we didn’t need to get it sized.)
I bought my husband a new band while we were in Ireland—it’s artisan-made and dates from a special trip—but I secretly keep hoping we’ll find the original ring somewhere.
I stopped wearing my wedding ring(s) during the pandemic. The pandemic was hard on my marriage. I feel like we are in a stronger place now after a lot of difficult conversations but I also realized I needed to not hold so tightly to our marriage. As I continue to evolve as an individual and become more myself as I approach my mid-40s, I needed to accept the possibility this would not last, even as I continue to want it and work for it with all my heart. Not sure if that makes sense but I realized I had to prioritize being true to myself, no matter the consequences. For some reason, it felt right to just not wear any rings for a while. I also dramatically downsized all the type of jewelry when I had kids. Too many grabby hands!
42 years ago ... I didn't want an engagement ring at all, but my fiancé thought it was the right thing to do (1979!) -- and I admit when I saw all those glittering diamonds on a velvet cloth I did kind of want one! We had so little $, and he spent $500 on a 21-point diamond -- it was minuscule but it wasn't terribly uncommon to have less than a carat back then. But, I am a lefty, and to have that sticking-up diamond on my left hand was incredibly annoying. I took it off after about three months and never wore it again, although I would occasionally take it out and admire its shine. My husband didn't mind :) We both wore/wear wedding rings, and that is fine with me. I have a very plain white gold etched band (because I don't like yellow gold), and I never take it off. It's survived fine. About a year and a half ago, our eldest asked me if he could have my engagement ring to propose to his girlfriend (he's a near-starving artist). I immediately said yes but I told him it's at least only about a quarter the size of diamonds these days; would his girlfriend be okay with a tiny ring? Turns out she loves it, she loves the sentimentality of it, and she has pretty, slim fingers that make that little chip look very good. I'm completely content!
My wedding ring had a bent prong so was waiting in my jewelry box to go to the jewelers when our house was burglarized while we were camping. We replaced my original ring with one I didn't like nearly as much, and it wasn't practical to wear as the mother of small kids. I realized at some point that it was lost. We replaced it one more time, back to the original design. My husband (and the insurance, I'm sure!) said no more rings! But at some point I've become more sensitive and if I wear the ring a lot it's irritating, so...I hardly wear it. Which is kind of sad, because it's beautiful.
I wear my engagement and wedding rings most days. I do take them off in the kitchen and while doing projects.
My husband lost his wedding ring, which he confessed to me about 10 days after he realized he couldn’t find it. Our rings weren’t a set. His was unique and beautiful, and I am still sad that it’s gone. (It was a heavy yellow gold with embossed acorns and leaves. It was vintage, and I remember thinking it was fate when we didn’t need to get it sized.)
I bought my husband a new band while we were in Ireland—it’s artisan-made and dates from a special trip—but I secretly keep hoping we’ll find the original ring somewhere.