Is It Possible to Responsibly Keep a Gun at Home?

Below is an essay I wrote in January of this year. I’ve had a lot of new subscribers since then, so I’m sending it out again. The topic is guns — including gun violence and gun suicides. Skip it you need to. Instead you could read about how my name was Shoshanna before it was Gabrielle.

If you’d like to read more of my writing about guns, here are links to three more essays:

Playing Superhero vs. Protecting Your Family (this one started as a viral Twitter thread)

Daydreaming About a Nationwide Gun Ban

How My Thoughts On Gun Control Have Changed

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Keeping a Gun In Your Home is Irresponsible

I made a few people angry yesterday when I tweeted about guns. It wasn’t a thread, just separate tweets, though they were all on the topic of guns:

Gabrielle Blair @designmom

It is impossible to responsibly keep a gun at home.

Gabrielle Blair @designmom

Agreed that keeping your gun in a safe is far better than not keeping it in safe, but it's nowhere near as good as not having a gun in your home at all.

Gabrielle Blair @designmom

EVERY gun owner claims they are a responsible gun owner. And yet mysteriously, gun suicides, gun accidents, and gun murders happen every single day, all with guns owned by those same responsible gun owners.

Gabrielle Blair @designmom

If you take a gun safety class and your main takeaway isn’t: I will definitely never keep a gun in my home it’s far too risky. Then… you didn’t learn gun safety and shouldn’t be allowed to own a gun.

People responded wanting to let me to know that they are the exception. Their gun is a safe gun; it could not possibly be used for harm because they keep it so safe. Other people wanted to tell me that they have to have a gun because they live in a rural area, (not some tame suburban neighborhood), and wildlife could come into the yard and need to be shot. Still others wanted to tell me that they have to have a gun because they live in a dangerous city (not some tame suburban neighborhood), where someone might break into their house and need to be shot. Some people insisted that my tweets represent an extreme position and that taking an extreme position is harmful not helpful.

And it’s all NONSENSE.

Guns make households less safe. Period. So bringing a gun into your home is an irresponsible choice. Which means there is no responsible way to keep a gun at home. Keeping a gun at home means there is an ever present risk of gun violence in your home. That’s a fact. That is not an extreme position. It is the total common sense position. If you’re interested in avoiding gun violence in your household, making sure your household doesn’t have access to a gun is the most effective option you’ve got.

The extreme position is the opposite: I need a gun at home. Guns at home is normal. Guns make homes safer. THAT is an extreme position. And if it doesn’t seem extreme to you, then the propaganda from the gun lobby and gun fanatics is working.

Despite claims otherwise, the ONLY reason people keep a gun at home is because they like guns and want to keep one at home. It’s not more complicated than that. They like owning the gun. They may even know about the risks, but they like guns so much they are willing to ignore the risks. It’s a selfish choice. They just like guns.

It’s fine for people to like things. We all like things. But it’s bizarre when someone claims they have very important and serious reasons for keeping a gun at home instead of just admitting they like guns.

For many years, I believed someone could responsibly keep a gun at home, but I no longer believe that. A gun at home won’t be used for protection, but there’s a good chance a household member will use it to hurt themselves or others.

Based on responses I fielded yesterday on Twitter, you might be having thoughts like this:

But I own a gun for going hunting.

Then you don’t need to store it at home. Keep it at a gun club. Better yet, don’t own a gun at all and just borrow one when you need to.

But I saw a snake on my porch.

So get a dart gun instead of shooting a hole in your porch.

But my teen is on the skeet shooting team at school.

Again, not necessary to store the gun in your home. Lots of team sporting equipment is not stored in individual homes.

But my gun is locked away and doing no harm.

Of course it’s doing harm. If nothing else you’re contributing to and taking part in the psycho gun culture in the US. Beyond that it’s putting your household at risk.

MoreShots🌻FewerShootings @design__hole

💯 “Responsible Gun Owner” is an oxymoron. Aside from their inherently deadly risk, purchasing guns & ammo contributes to -& condones- a corrupt industry that sows death, terror & suffering.

Gabrielle Blair @designmom

It is impossible to responsibly keep a gun at home.

But I keep my gun in a safe.

I’m pro-gun safes, but let’s be very clear that guns stored in safes can still be removed from the safe and used for harm. This happens literally every day. A household with a gun is far more likely to experience gun violence than a household without a gun. Again, that’s just common sense.

But my kids/grandkids don’t even know the code to the safe.

Maybe if they’re toddlers, but if they’re older they definitely know and they’ve definitely told their siblings. They also know where you hide your favorite chocolates. If your grandson is having a bad day and decides he wants your gun, he will access it in less than two minutes when you nod off in front of the TV.

Steven Johnson @puupypants

@designmom Agreed. My dad kept his guns and ammo separate and locked up, and I was still able to get into everything as a resourceful and mischievous 13-year-old.

Leesh @LeeshD1

@designmom I would have disagreed years ago but ever since my dad killed himself using his own gun that was locked up in his own safe… yeah. Guns in homes just seems irresponsible at this point

L. Tom Hagen @1stConsigliere

@designmom My family member kept his handgun locked up and the ammo separate. His child still used that gun to kill himself.

Liana Brooks @LianaBrooks

My family didn't keep guns, but I knew where guns were in every house I babysat in, visited, and all my neighbors' houses because kids notice. And kids talk.

Gabrielle Blair @designmom

It is impossible to responsibly keep a gun at home.

And remember, it was you or your spouse that told them how to access the gun! Because you read some fear-mongering story about break-ins and wanted the kids to know how to access the gun in case they need to “protect” themselves. By doing so you put them at great risk and made them far less safe.

Which brings us to talking about gun suicides. Please read the following four tweets:

Gabrielle Blair @designmom

- Guns are the most common method of suicides; used in about half of suicide deaths. - Having access to a gun greatly increases the chance someone will suddenly, unexpectedly, and successfully kill themselves.

npr.orgCDC: U.S. Suicide Rates Have Climbed DramaticallyGuns are the most common method used for suicide, accounting for the deaths of almost half the people who kill themselves, a Centers for Disease Control and Prevention study finds.

Gabrielle Blair @designmom

- Most suicides happen without warning. 54% of the people who kill themselves don't have mental health issues, but instead are going through a temporary low-point — relationship problems, money problems, physical health problems.

Gabrielle Blair @designmom

- 85% of suicide attempts using guns are successful. - Suicide attempts using non-gun methods are not nearly as successful. In fact, drug overdose, the most widely used method in suicide attempts, is fatal in less than 3 percent of cases.

hsph.harvard.eduGuns & SuicideSpecial report by Madeline Drexler, Editor, Harvard Public Health In the national debate over gun violence—a debate stoked by mass murders such as last December’s tragedy in a Newtown, Connecticut,…

Gabrielle Blair @designmom

- The decision for most people to take their lives happens in less than five minutes from thought to completion. That’s one reason (of many) why guns are so dangerous to have in the home. - Suicide is unpredictable. PLEASE do not keep guns in your home.

But I’m a responsible gun owner.

No you’re not. There’s no such thing. Unless and until the term “responsible gun owner” is legally defined and there are legal consequences tied to the definition, then the term is meaningless. Every gun owner I’ve ever talked to (and I’ve talked to thousands at this point) is convinced they are a responsible gun owner, but they can’t seem to agree on what that means.

But I’m trained in gun use and gun safety.

Train all you want. Having a gun in your home is by definition irresponsible. And if your trainer isn’t teaching you that having a gun at home makes your household less safe, then the training doesn’t sound legit.

But there’s nothing we can do, there are just too many guns in the US.

Baloney. Be creative, figure out what would motivate a gun fanatic to give up their guns. Privileges? Do we need to take away passports or driver’s licenses or wifi or freeze their bank accounts until they willingly hand in their guns? Money? Do we need to pay them to willingly hand-in their guns? The good news is we can get rid of 50% of the guns if we just focus on motivating 3% of the population, because 3% of the population own half the guns.

How would we fund this type of thing? Consider how much we currently spend on gun violence in the form of prisons, medical care, and police budgets. We can save a huge amount of money in all 3 of those categories if we get rid of the guns.

But we just need to focus on gun safety protocols.

Sure! Yes! I’m all for safety protocols. I have advocated for them for years. Let’s require gun insurance. Let’s make federal gun laws not state gun laws — only federal laws can be effective in a country where people can freely go from state to state. Let’s require safety classes before you can qualify for a gun license. I’m up for all the ideas! I’m also in favor of gun owners realizing they don’t need a gun and that it’s making their household less safe, so they should just get rid of it.

But guns aren’t the problem, people are the problem.

Fine. In that case I don’t think guns are selfish and irresponsible, I think are gun owners are.

We can not treat fearful excuses for keeping a gun at home as “reasonable anxieties” because every time we do, the gun lobby and gun fanatics escalate their resistance to even the smallest reforms.

Every day brings multiple new headlines — 11 people shot and killed at a festival, a man shot and killed his girlfriend, a toddler found a gun and shot and killed their sibling. So much preventable death and violence. It makes me nauseous. Guns make your household less safe. Perhaps we should get rid of them.

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