Being Snobby About Romance Novels

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Hey there. How are you? I read an article about Romance novels that I keep thinking about. The author started reading romance novels when she was in her early 30s because she needed to for work, and she has kept reading romance novels, because she says she found out they were awesome. The article is titled "Why You Should Be Reading Romance Novels" and suggests that if you think you don't like romance novels, you might want to unpack why that is (the author thinks the reason is probably: misogyny). 

The article discusses why romance novels have been historically disrespected, why they're important and valuable, and why they're way better than you might think. The author also includes tons of links to romance novels if you need a recommendation.

Here are a few paragraphs from the article to get you started:

"I don’t want to spend too much time on romance’s bad reputation, which is born of misogyny, snobbishness, bias against small paperbacks, misogyny, and a lack of appreciation for delightfully cheesy book covers. But if you’re thinking, Bad reputation is right, and fairly earned!, then please just keep reading. Because if that’s what you think, odds are you haven’t read any romance, at least not recently."

"After growing up on Madeleine L’Engle or Louisa May Alcott and graduating into a high-school canon so dominated by men, imagine the relief and delight to read about women. And to read about such adult things — not adult as in sex, but adult concerns, like love and courtship and family strife. To see in those pages possible paths forward, worlds and happy endings to imagine yourself into."

"Women have been historically excluded from the canon, and that carries on through to publishing today. Women’s voices and stories — as authors and characters — have been systematically devalued in literature. We see how a man’s thinly veiled autobiographical musings are hailed as revolutionary, but a woman’s are dismissed. How male authors write women who only serve their male characters’ journeys and are lauded for the bare minimum beyond that. How sex, in literary fiction, is rarely actually fun, and if it is then someone must pay the price."

"People love to demean romance as “smut,” as if the only thing worse than women writing stories about women is women writing stories about women having sex. But if you’re just looking for titillation you are going to be very disappointed with all the pages spent on things like plot and character development."

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I definitely put myself in the I-don't-read-or-like-romance-novels category, but I found the article's arguments very compelling, and now I'm thinking I should seek them out. And now I’m curious. Do you read romance novels? And what exactly counts as a romance novel? Am I reading romance novels already and I don't know it? For example, when I picture romance novels, I assume we're talking about an inexpensive paperback with a bare-chested man on the cover. But my friend Katherine Center writes lovely feel-good novels that have happy endings and are inevitably romantic. Are they considered part of the Romance Novel Genre? If not, why not?

If you read the article and find yourself convinced to give romance novels a chance, I'd love to hear. If you read the article and still feel like you can't take romance novels seriously, I'd also love to hear that. If you don’t have time to read the article, NPR had a segment last month (you can listen/read) that talked about romance novels and shared recommendations. And if you're already a huge romance novel reader, please feel free to share your favorites!

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On Design Mom This Week

-A home tour featuring Elle, who is going through a really hard divorce at age 39, after being with him since she was 15.

-The Ultimate Guide to Campfire Cooking.

-An easy DIY for Oversize Yard Yahtzee.

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Here Are A Few Things I’ve Wanted to Share With You

-I really appreciated this note from Demi Levato. I think the focus on intent is helpful, but I also think it’s important that they acknowledged how difficult it can be. I try really hard to get people’s preferred pronouns correct, and I still mess up too often — my brain pathways in this regard are deeply set and hard to overcome. Sometimes I feel irritated when I see memes or tweets acting like using they/them for an individual should be the easiest thing in the world. Maybe it should be, but in my experience, it’s not. Using they/them requires concentrated effort, and I have to practice to get it right. Even with the effort I still mess up, and my usage is often halted or unnatural. Still working on it and happy to do so! But just grateful Demi acknowledged the difficulty.

Demi Lovato @ddlovato

I felt the need to post this because I often find that the change in pronouns can be confusing for some, and difficult to remember for others. It’s all about your intention. It’s important to me that you try, but if you make a mistake, it’s okay 😊🙏🏼💞

-I feel this so hard.

Kate Helen Downey @katehelendowney

Let’s stop pretending there are different jobs. There’s only one job and it’s emails.

-In France, the president announced that people will have to show a "health pass" to visit cafes, bars or shopping centers. This announcement spurred a record number of people here to get a vaccine appointment. Would something like this work where you live?

-Fox News obsession with CRT continues.

Media Matters @mmfa

Fox News' obsession with critical race theory, now updated mediamatters.org/fox-news/fox-n…

-Related: Excellent reporting on the obscure racist group quietly funding the made-up hysteria behind CRT.

-Also related: Hahahah!

Casey Fiesler, PhD, JD, geekD @cfiesler

I feel like if professors actually had the power to brainwash their students, a lot more students would read the syllabus.

-I’m seeing lots of news stories about moving to a 4-day work week. “…more than 15 months into the pandemic, there’s a growing conversation about how American workers can take back more of their time. The trauma and disruption of the last year and a half have a lot of Americans reevaluating their relationships to work…” Where are you at on this idea? Have you experienced a shift in how you think about work?

-I haven’t seen sex framed this way:

Nnedi Okorafor, PhD @Nnedi

Yep.

-So then it was definitely an attempted coup. I really hate that they waited six months to share this information so that they could save it for book promotion.

-The Christian Right Is in Decline, and It’s Taking America With It. I’ve been thinking about this op-ed in the NYTimes. “If they can’t own the country, they’re ready to defile it.”

-I get asked on Instagram about my jeans all the time — they are Levi’s 501 Originals. They are normally priced at around $100, but this cute cropped version is currently on sale for $28!

Feel free to share your thoughts in response to anything above. I hope you have a lovely weekend. I’ll be in touch again via newsletter next week.

kisses,
Gabrielle