Hi, I’m Gabrielle Blair and this is my newsletter. It’s completely free to access and read, but if you feel so moved to support my work, please consider a paid newsletter subscription: just $5/month or save money with the $50/annual sub. You can also go way above and beyond by becoming a Founding Member at $75. Thank you! Seriously, thank you. Support from readers keeps this newsletter ad and sponsor-free.
Everyone Is Here!
Hey there. Lots of happy things happening here at the moment, but the biggest happy thing is that all six of our kids are under one roof, for the first time since Christmas 2019. I can hardly believe it. A full year and a half since the younger siblings have been with the oldest two. It feels like our collective joy is going to burst at the seams! A few observations from the few days we’ve had together:
-It’s fun to see that over those 18 months, growth spurts for some of the kids have changed the height order of the siblings; younger-older is starting to feel more peer-to-peer.
-It’s interesting to see how sibling roles within the family change over time. For example, when the older three kids are away at school, Oscar is the oldest one at home, and takes on the role of the oldest. But when the older three kids are home, Oscar is one of the “little kids”.
-Eight people is SO MANY people. It keeps making me laugh as we run errands and tumble out the car and fill up an aisle of the grocery store. We are a spectacle when we are all together. I had forgotten what that feels like.
-It can be overwhelming to be with so many people if you’re used to spending a lot of time alone, so we’re trying hard to make sure that everyone knows they can escape to an unoccupied room if they need some space.
We Moved In! We Actually Moved In!
Another big happy thing: We moved into the Tall House! (The Tall House is the house here in France that we’ve been renovating — you can check out blog posts about it.) This move is happening about 7 months after I thought it would, but I’ll gladly take it.
The work isn’t fully complete — for example, the future dining room currently has a floor with a big section of dirt — but most of the house is fully livable.
It feels really good to be here and we love getting to know the house as residents and not just renovators. Getting to know the house includes making funny discoveries like one of the toilets is connected to a hot water pipe instead of cold water. Flora June noticed this when the water in the toilet was steaming! So we’ll add that to our list of “still need to work on” tasks.
Moving within the same town feels so different than moving across the country, or across the ocean. Instead of renting a truck and hiring movers, we’ve used our family van and transitioned our belongings slowly over lots of days. Instead of boxes, we’ve used the big reusable grocery sacks that are popular here (similar to the blue Ikea bags). We fill them up, bring them to the Tall House, empty them, and then do it again. A few loads a day. Nothing too intense.
At this point, the only things left to move are the big pieces that we don’t think will fit in the van — so we may end up renting a truck for a few hours for those.
It’s been interesting to compare this slower move to our other moves. I think at different stages of my life I might have hated the slowness, but right now it’s really working for me. It’s spreading out the decision fatigue in a good way.
Have you ever tried a slow move? Did it help you manage the stress (moves are hard!), or did it drag out the stress over too many days?
Here Are A Few Things I’ve Wanted to Share With You
-My discussions with the kids about spending time alone reminded me of this beautiful video. Do you ever seek solo time? Do you ever go to dinner or the movies on your own? Do you like it or does it make you feel lonely? Do your kids seek alone time?
-This essay about the reality of life on the International Space Station is so interesting. Sim Kern, the author, makes a very strong argument that the billionaires won’t actually be able to escape to space while the earth burns.
-Did you read the viral essay that was passed around last year? It’s called Cat Person and it’s written by Kristen Roupenian. Well, it turns out it’s based on a real person that the author doesn’t actually know in real life, and that real person, Alexis Nowicki, wrote a response essay. The internet has been discussing the response. Many people have dismissed her complaints, saying stuff like if you don’t want a writer to write about your bad behavior, don’t behave badly around writers. But not everyone agrees. I appreciated this really thoughtful thread about art and consent — it brings up a point of view I hadn’t considered.
-Washington Post reports: The Biden admin has unveiled plans to bring hundreds, possibly thousands, of deported veterans and their immediate family members back to the United States, saying their removal "failed to live up to our highest values."
-On Sunday (the 4th), we spent time at the D-Day beaches and the American Military Cemetery. It’s always a sobering and emotional visit. If you’re curious about what it’s like, you can see photos and discussion, or check out my full tour.
-I’m so worn out of men dismissing, degrading, and disrespecting the work women do. Moms Demand is not “some mom group.” It’s a massive force for good; a brilliant example of effective grass roots organizing.
-Hahahaha!
-This thread about nuclear power vs. fossil fuels, started a conversation with the kids about clean energy — we discussed the pros and cons of solar power, nuclear power, geo-thermal power, etc.. Here are samples of similar discussions from Twitter:
Midway through the discussion with the kids I felt myself getting angry. We as a country should absolutely be debating this topic. I believe multiple political parties (at least two) is a good thing — it helps us consider more points of view and pushes us to do better problem solving. And right now, our two major political parties should be having a robust debate/discussion/conversation about investing in a shift to Nuclear Power versus investing in a shift to Solar/Geothermal/Wind power. It should be an urgent discussion; a priority for our time, attention, and resources.
Instead, we’re having to talk about CRT, with nonsense debates that suck all the air out of the room. It’s making me crazy.
-Some pure joy to take you into the weekend:
Feel free to share your thoughts in response to anything above. I hope you have a lovely weekend. I’ll be in touch again via newsletter next week.
kisses,
Gabrielle
I bet it feels so good to have everyone together again! My sister has been "stuck" in Australia since March 2020 (we last saw her Christmas 2019 as well), and we really do miss her.
About needing alone time- I SO need alone time. I moved back in with my parents at 3 years ago, and finally moved out this past December. The timing was largely because I wasn't getting enough alone time, especially alone time at home, which is something I really need. To add to that, my mom and I work directly with each other. We're both teachers at the same school AND same grade level. We're departmentalized- I teach writing and she teaches reading, so we spend a lot of time planning together and we have the same students. We work surprisingly well together, but it's nice to not see her all day at work and then also at home (especially since our work schedules are identical, so we're always home at the same times).
I called Chris Vickery out on his “mom’s group” statement the other day. And in true fragile male ego/ cowardly fashion, he blocked me. He blocked anyone who disagreed with his bs.